Are you single? Chances are you’re on an online dating app. The popular ones for people like me in their 20s are Tinder, Bumble, or Coffee Meets Bagel. If you’re a busy person, there is no better way to meet new people. I spend most of my weekdays at work or writing articles for deTeched so the chances of meeting someone while I’m out with my friends is relatively low.
I’m pretty new to the dating game after being in back-to-back relationships for the past six years. Let me just start off by saying online dating is entertaining, to say the least. You come across some beautiful girls and some downright weirdos. Superficial is to online dating as exaggeration is to resume. As a member of the male demographic, I know I’m guilty of the same thing. It feels like a numbers game and you swipe based on looks. I don’t know if it’s different from a female perspective, but this seems to be the consensus with a lot of guys I know. With that being said, here are the five most annoying things I’ve seen on Tinder. This list is representative of all dating apps but Tinder rolls of the tongue so I’ll use it as a general term for all online dating apps.
1. Posting Venmo accounts on a profile
This might be the most infuriating thing I’ve come across Tinder. I had absolutely no idea this was an actual thing, but some girls will post their Venmo account on their profile. This is in hopes that some random sucker will send them money in hopes of catching the girl’s attention. You’ll see something along the lines of “help a broke college girl out” or “Venmo me :)”. What you’re seeing is a description of the modern-day panhandler. I don’t know what’s worse, the girl who puts her Venmo account in her profile or the guy who gives her money. What I’m really curious about is if this tactic actually works. I’m going to assume so because I see a good amount of profiles with a Venmo account. I guess if you get a free lunch out of it, you come out a winner. To all the guys out there, have a little bit of self-respect. You’re not going to impress her by sending her money.
2. Group pictures
It should be mandatory that the first picture on a profile is of yourself only. I don’t know how many girls I’ve come across where every single picture is a group picture and I have to play Sherlock Holmes to figure out whose profile this is. “Okay, so I can eliminate this girl because she’s not in the second and third picture. Is this girl the same person in the other photo? Okay, I’ve narrowed the list down to three girls.” Noone wants to play detective work to figure out who you are. The exception is if you’re attracted to every girl in the group picture which means “screw it, I’m swiping right”.
3. Bots
Tinder is the worst when it comes to bots. It’s impressive how sophisticated some of these bots are too. I’m one of those guys who swipes quickly and reads profiles after I match. The general rule of thumb is if you see someone with a profile that is blank or generic, she’s most likely a bot. This is a unique problem for males and you’ve got to be careful. If you match with a girl and she starts sending you messages to visit a link, unmatch as quickly as you can. No matter how hot she is. Once you see enough bots, you can generally avoid 95% of them. The more sophisticated ones are harder to spot and have more realistic profiles. If you’ve got a feeling in your gut that it’s a bot, just do yourself a favor and unmatch. Don’t be that guy who gets scammed.
4. Profiles with only Instagram or Snapchat handles
It’s common for many guys to feel tongue-tied about how to start a conversation on an online dating app. Based on what I’ve heard, it’s very common that a girl will get more guys trying to talk to her than the other way around. You want to start a meaningful conversation with the other sex which is easier when a girl lists out things she likes in her profile. You can figure out some clever way to talk about mutual interests to get the conversation flowing. It is hella annoying when you only see an Instagram or Snapchat handle on a girl’s profile. Instagram has become a careful curation of the modern-day millennial. “I don’t feel like putting my interests in words so here is an album of all the things I like. It just so happens that 75% of my pictures are in a bikini because I love the beach that much.” I know I sound like a hater but the main reason this annoys me is that some girls use dating apps to get more followers on their Instagram. Sometimes I see a quote that says “never on Tinder, message me on Instagram” and I think what is the purpose of you being on Tinder. My favorite part is when a girl lists her Instagram handle and you go on it to find her Instagram is private. You have to creepily add her on Instagram just to see what she’s all about. How does that make any sense?
5. One-sided conversations or radio silence
I try to make it a point to start a conversation with everyone I match with. Isn’t that the reason you swiped right. If for some reason I’m not interested, I’ll just unmatch right away. Man, there are some terrible conversations that go on in Tinder. This could be partially my fault with the way I talk to people. I like to ask questions to get to know the person better. The worst conversations are when it’s one-sided. Normal conversations have a flow where both people contribute equally to the conversation asking questions or giving answers. There have been some occasions where it feels like I’m interrogating the girl because I’m asking all the questions. I matched with a girl who had a flag for every country she’s ever traveled to. She must’ve been to over twenty places. I asked her “what’s your favorite place that you’ve traveled to and what was the best part about being in that country?” Her answer was “I like all places.” You can probably imagine how that conversation went. I gave up after a couple of messages.
Another annoying thing you’ll run into is radio silence. You’ll match with a girl which is always an ego-booster. You get excited because you share similar interests and send her a message only to get crickets. If you’re not going to talk to someone you match with either unmatch or don’t swipe right in the first place. It defeats the whole purpose of matching with someone. However, radio silence is definitely deserved if either party starts the conversation with “hey”. I totally understand that. w
Like I mentioned before, this is from the perspective of a guy. Guys are definitely guilty of this as well. I’m sure if I was a girl I would get sick of the endless pictures of shirtless guys who are holding a fish. I don’t really have a way of knowing how bad guys are because all of my female friends are shacked up. Regardless, this is behavior that both sides can stop doing. I’m not on Tinder to become a follower on your Instagram or send you money because you are broke. I am broke and I would rather spend my money at Chick-fil-A. Maybe I’ll meet a girl there, kill two birds with one stone. Let us know what annoying things you’ve come across online dating.